Lost contacts! 

I’ve my mobile handy..
I’ve my network coverage..
I’ve got a lasting battery..
I’ve got sufficient balance..

I’ve not lost my mobile..
I’ve not changed my number..
I’ve not been locked out of my account..
I’ve not lost my backup contact list..

Yet, I keep wondering how, why and when..
How it happened to me?
Why it happened to me?
When did I lose my contacts?

Is it while busily running behind,
The wild goose called passion?
Is it while stealthily being buried,
Under the pretense of being busy?

Is it while missing the calls,
And not returning after becoming free too?
Is it while ignoring the nudges and pushes
Of instinct to wish the dear friend on birthday?

Is it while having the phone in hand,
While it rings and listening to the tune
And neither hitting answer nor reject
And not even the text of customary, I’ll call you back?

Is it while knowing pretty well that
Your friend is hiding and not caring to pull them out?
Is it while knowing pretty well that
No one is gonna pull me out and ignoring to push myself?

I’ve my mobile handy..
I’ve my network coverage..
I’ve got a lasting battery..
I’ve got sufficient balance..

I’ve not lost my mobile..
I’ve not changed my number..
I’ve not been locked out of my account..
I’ve not lost my backup contact list..

Yet, I keep wondering how, why and when..
How it happened to me?
Why it happened to me?
When did I lose my contacts?

Paradise Lost

கண்ணிலான் பெற்றிழந்தான்..
I don’t remember where I heard this first time, but I’m so grateful for the one who introduced me to this line..

What’s it about this line?
Transliteration – kaNNilaan peRRizhandhaan..
Translation – A blind person, got sight and lost it back..
Conceived by – Kamban
Verse – 325 of Kamba Ramayanam

This is an epitome of agony and pain undergone by a person at times of loss..

Context:
The mighty king Dasarathan was blessed with his children after several prayers..
He was asked, of his son Rama, to be of service, to a hermit in the forests, a hazardous job for a Prince..
The mentality of the king is portrayed as that of a blind, who had enjoyed the blessings of the vision and has gone back blind..

Why the line pops into my mind and blows me off every time?
The loss could have been described in so many ways..

Why not simply say that as a person gone blind?
When one is gifted with vision at birth, it’s taken for granted..
But if one is born blind, he would have an thirst for vision..
The gift of vision can only be contemplated at it’s best, only by a blind..
He treasures the power of vision..
When the sight is taken back, he simply has to return to his former state..

When a person is born with vision and has gone blind in between, has to learn a new way of complementing his visionary power..
But for a person born blind, that’s his natural state..
He evolves and grows with the absence of vision..

So isn’t it easy to restore to someone’s natural state?
What’s the harm in it?

The person could have led his whole life without vision and even could have achieved something in his life..

It’s always easier to acquire, grow, multiple the resources we start with..
As the resource grows, the person evolves along..
But when the resources begin the downfall, there’s no going back of the evolution..

The evolution is like carvings on a stone..
When the resources are taken back, it shatters the heart into shrapnel..
You could live with a blank stone, but not with a shattered piece..
Whether the person stays still or move forward, it hurts the person..

Nothing ever could heal the hurt of the heart..
Even if someday the vision is once again restored, still the void, the pain exists..
Nothing could ever conceal it from one’s own conscience..

A few of you might have experienced this:
Desired something for so long,
thought about it day and night,
gone in search of that treasure with all your heart,
Foregoing every other pleasure for it,
Dedicated the mind, heart and soul for it,
And the success knocks on your door..

The happiness is just divine and is something to be felt and could never be put into words..

Then comes the tragedy,
Even before you could completely embrace your happiness,
The result of success is to be borrowed,
Not a giveaway, Not distorting it,
Just a borrowing,
Still you know the usage by the borrower might lead to anything…
You may or may not get it back,
You might not be the same without it again,
You are to relinquish the treasure voluntarily..

That’s the exact feel of
கண்ணிலான் பெற்றிழந்தான்..

எண்ணிலா அருந்தவத்தோன் இயம்பிய சொல் மருமத்தின் எறிவேல் பாய்ந்த
புண்ணிலாம் பெரும் புழையில் கனல் நுழைந்தால் எனச் செவியில் புகுதலோடும்
உண்ணிலா வியதுயரம் பிடித்து உந்த ஆருயிர் நின்று ஊசல் ஆடக்
கண்ணிலான் பெற்றிழந்தான் என உழந்தான் கடும் துயரம் காலவேலான்

(கம்ப.328)

Liberation

This is a song written in Tamil and translated to English! This time the translation is for my verse..

Liberation

It’s neither few nor many,
Who broke the wings.
The tears that are spilling ain’t falling
Either in the prison or pillow!

The corpse hidden to thoughts
Had hidden away
The peace and sleep too

In that moment of
Lost mind and
Lost peace

The coolness of the moon
The brightness of the sun
The gentleness if the breeze
The ferocity of storm
Fused into a ball

The ball reached
Deep inside to
Reveal the truth!

That the prison is in thoughts!!
Though the wings are fine,
The thoughts are not fine,
Thus, restricting the wings,
That might soar the skies!!

Is there any worse sword
To break one into pieces?

When will this prison break?
When will this wings soar?


viduthalai

siRagudaithathu silaralla palarumalla
sindhum vizhineer vazhindhodi vizhuvadhu
siRaiyumalla sayana araiyumalla

sindanaikkul maRaitha savam
sayanathaiyum samaadaanathaiyum
saduthiyil thunaikkazhaikka

sithamizhanthu
siRagumizhanthu
thiGaitha nodiyil

thinGalin thanmaiyim
kathiravanin oLiyum
thendralin menmaiyum
kaDunGaatrin vEgamum
ottRai pandhil
onRaanathu

athu uruNdodi
uLam pugunthu
uraiththathOr unMai!

siraipattadu sindanaiyilena!
siRagugal seeraaga irunthum
seerazhintha sindanai mattume
siragadaithu vaanalakkum
sindanaiyaiyum varuthiyathena!

vaayadaikka ithaninum kodiya
vaaL uLatho?

enRu Oyum intha salanam?
enRu viriyum intha siRagu?


விடுதலை

சிறகுடைத்தது சிலரல்ல பலருமல்ல
சிந்தும் விழிநீர் வழிந்தோடி விழுவது
சிறையுமல்ல சயன அறையுமல்ல

சிந்தனைக்குள் மறைத்த சவம்
சயனத்தையும் சமாதானத்தையும்
சடுதியில் துணைக்கழைக்க

சித்தமிழந்து
சிறகுமிழந்து
திகைத்த நொடியில்

திங்களின் தன்மையும்
கதிரவனின் ஒளியும்
தென்றலின் மென்மையும்
கடுங்காற்றின் வேகமும்
ஒற்றைப் பந்தில்
ஒன்றானது

அது உருண்டோடி
உளம் புகுந்து
உரைத்ததோர் உண்மை!

சிறைபட்டது சிந்தனையிலென!!
சிறகுகள் சீராக இருந்தும்
சீரழிந்த சிந்தனை மட்டுமே
சிறகடைத்து வானளக்கும்
சிந்தனையையும் வருத்தியதுமென!!

வாயடைக்க இதனினும் கொடிய
வாள் உளதோ

என்று ஓயும் இந்த சலனம்
என்று விரியும் இந்த சிறகு..

Perspectives!

He: I like you!
Me: WHAT? That is creepy!
We: Just met strangers and the stranger has no prospect of staying on even as an acquaintance.

He: I like you!
Me: Hmm.. Okay..
We: New acquaintance who has not revealed anything creepy so far, yet without having any prospect of anything more than acquaintance.

He: I like you!
Me: 😀 Yeah I too kinda like you..
We: Some new friend who has recently got promoted to friend zone.

He: I like you!
Me: Oh really?! I couldn’t have guessed it ever, even with a whole page of notifications of likes and comments of posts from more than year old posts.. 😛
We: He really likes me and I don’t hate him, yet.. 😉

He: I like you!
Me: He he he.. Me too dear.. 😀
We: A good friend where we both like each other platonically.

He: I like you!
Me: [Does a double flip on cloud nine and replies] “Thanks!” with or without a blushing smiley
We: Oh yeah, that’s from crush.

He: I like you!
Me: Shut up dumbo! And just tell where to dig the hole to bury the corpse!
We: That is indeed my partner in crime and shine.

He: I like you!
Me: Is it?! You know it’s the first time you said it? So what should I talk about to dad for you?!
We: Right guess, that’s my younger sibling!

He: I like you!
Me: (in a panic) What?! Just like? What happened darling? Don’t say ‘we need to talk‘ too!
We: That’s not something I want to hear from my love.. 😉 I would rather have ‘I love you bit less today’.. 😛

He: I like you!
Me: OMG!!!! You at last found out that you LIKE me huh? After putting up with me for decades and being part of all my fun moments and also part of the ruin party of all my over-the-top joys?! Btw, I just hate you sweety for just liking me.. 😛
We: That’s my bestie!! 😀

The pioneer

If you don’t find what you are looking for, start giving them out. Because someone somewhere is just searching like you.

You would very rarely be guided or be given what you are looking for. But you are not the only one looking for that particular thing. You do know the joy of receiving exactly what you need and when you need. Be that help to someone else.

Never ever second guess whether you are capable of it. You are giving out something which is non existent. So you are the best. But will it be the best forever?
Only if you keep updating yourself and keep running that race.

Do you wanna be the winner or pioneer? Start as pioneer and end as winner!!

The Observer!

The Observer

And here I am,
Looking around and knowing;

Who loves their coffee,
Who drinks for thirst of it,
Who gulps it without tasting,
Who enjoys the company better
than their coffee,
Who ignores the coffee,
Coz they were lost
In the eyes of the company..

 

Yet,
I enjoy my coffee
In every sip,

Inhaling the aroma
deep enough
To fill every pore of my lungs,

Tasting the flavor
long enough
To indulge every taste bud,

Relishing the twirls
not so long enough
But just enough
To know every direction
The liquid flows
With every little stir,

Holding the cup
just in the way
To let the warmth
spread through the palm
And add warmth
To the heart,

Still the mind,
Eludes and wonders
At some rare times,
Who observes
This observer?

A drop of water!

Is this drop
From heaven or
From hell?

Is it based on
Where you start or on
Where you end…

Are you
A sign of life?
Coming from dew drops..

Are you
A sign of death?
Coming from the tears…

Are you
A sign of wound?
Coming from the pain of heart…

Are you
A sign of heal?
Coming from the Phoenix’s tears…

A drop of water dripping from a tap.

The Drop of Water!

Your travel
Just
Started?
On the way?
At the end?

Are you
Gonna evaporate
And disappear into thin air?

Are you
Gonna get absorbed
And lose yourself
Into a renewed seedling?

Are you
Gonna fall

On a shell,
And create
An exquisite pearl?

On a peacock,
And initiate
A mesmerizing dance?

On a stone,
And drained
In the cosmic silence?

On a photo,
To be the content
Of my verses?

Oh, dear drop…
It’s my capital error,
To think of you as tiny…

For you could also be
The proof of life
And source of life..

For we are nothing
Without you..
Physically,
Emotionally
And Creatively…

I bow before thee,
For thy omnipresence
And magnificence…

Wondering what next!

I am not a person with strict timetable to lead or follow..  Yet, I always had at least the rough road map and the general idea on where I am going.. But now I feel lost in the woods without a map to follow!

I committed to write a post every single day!!

What a stupid commitment.. That is what my mind is repeating since I thought of writing the post for today. Because, I am already getting lost on what to write..

It is then I remembered a quote from somewhere.. If you don’t know what to say, when you are before an audience, go with what is troubling your mind first..

See, that really works! Now it feels like I could enjoy the adventure of discovering the forest, even if I am lost, as long as I don’t lose my spirit of adventure!

That’s it for today folks.. Let’s meet on the next leg of adventure tomorrow!